Resolutions

It has been a long time since I've made any New Year's resolutions. I was tired of making them and failing, so I gave up on them. It seems a lot of other people do that too, but there are still plenty that make resolutions every year. When I wasn't making them myself, I thought it was pretty stupid to even try, but I realize now that's not the case.

What those people who make resolutions year after year are doing is keeping hope alive. They aren't letting failure get to them. They aren't giving up, even though year after year they find themselves making the same resolutions. Does it matter if it's the same? Why give up entirely? It seems more stupid to sit back and not do a damn thing about the stuff you want to change rather than at least trying year after year after year after year. Maybe one year, the resolution will stick.

I don't think it's a bad thing to make a resolution to lose weight. I didn't want to be one of the masses who resolve to lose weight this year, another dietary sheep of 2002. But to put it off any longer was just defiant and foolish. In an effort not to be another resolution-making loser, I was choosing not making the changes that would make me feel better and be better. As any guidance counselor would tell me, "The only person you're hurting is yourself."

The timing of my new exercise plan did happen to fall around the time of the New Year, mostly because I put it off so long. I could have started it a lot sooner, like when I first talked about it, but I didn't. I'm not saying that makes me different than anyone else who is on a new fitness or diet plan. It's no different at all, because I'm sure everyone else had the same intentions I did in November and December. So there's no avoiding the fact I've made a resolution to lose weight and get more fit in 2002.

But that's not the only resolution I want to make. I have others on my list. I talked about most of them a little while ago, but it's worth repeating, now that I'm doing the official resolution thing.

First, there's the dining room table. It's been a pain in my ass and a burden on my conscience for over a year now. It's time we have a real dining room table again, not one with loose tiles laid over the particle board insert and hidden by a tablecloth. Tablecloths are a big pain in the ass too. You can't wipe them off when your kids spill on them less than ten minutes from the time you first put the thing on the table. They hold crumbs like black pants hold fur. They never stay on straight. They look pretty and hide things, but it's not worth the trouble. I'm tired of tablecloths, and I refuse to use vinyl ones, so it's time I decide what to do with the stupid tiles and stick them on there permanent-like.

After that, I'm going to paint the last wall in the living room. That's waited over a year too. Mostly, I'm just too lazy to tape off the window area, but it's also because I couldn't decide whether I wanted to paint inside the window casing or not. I'm deciding now. I'm not going to paint the stupid thing because, say it with me, it's a pain in the ass. There is nothing like a pain in my ass to keep me from doing something, so I'm not going to do that which causes the pain in my ass. Once I get that stupid wall painted, I'll cover up the gloppy mistakes I made on the ceiling when I painted the first three walls. I'd say I'd paint the ceiling too, but I'm not going to set myself up for certain failure. Resolutions should at least be doable, not impossible dreams, you know.

Finally comes the bathroom ceiling. I've talked about it before, taken pictures of it, feared it, scraped it, ignored it. I've done everything but take care of it. It's become clear that I will have to install a fan in the bathroom. That's the whole reason we have the peeling paint problem in the first place. It causes aggressive mold and mildew that even Tilex daily shower spray has a hard time preventing. I could save myself a lot of work, a lot of worry about mold throughout my house, a lot of ceiling repainting if I just install the damn fan. I've watched it done on a million home improvement shows. It's something I can do, but again, it's a pain in the ass. I would imagine it is much less a pain in the ass in the long run than cleaning mildew and scraping paint all the time, but it's a big project pain in the ass rather than being a little, annoying, once-in-a-while pain in the ass. I'll just have to crack down and do it. I'll be happy for it in the end.

I was really tempted to make cleaning up the basement a resolution, but I think that's asking a bit much. I'll continue to work on it, but I'm not going to vow to have it cleaned up by 2003. The other things are more important now, so they get resolution status. The basement will have to wait, unless by some strange miracle I get the other things done. I'll call the basement a resolution alternate. At least then it has some sort of chance of becoming a full-fledged resolution.

So let's recap:

1. Lose thirty pounds, exercise regularly, run the 5K at the Marathon, eat better
   
2. Tile the dining room table
   
3. Paint the fourth wall in the living room and repair mistakes on ceiling
   
4. Install bathroom fan and fix the ceiling

   Alternate: Clean basement

There you have it. I made resolutions for 2002. Woo!