We went to the mall yesterday. I needed shoes that no longer ripped the skin off my pinky toes when I walked. The shoes I had were always too big. I tend to do that when I buy shoes; buy them too big. I think it's because sometimes I have to buy them big because my feet are so wide. Nobody makes nice shoes in anything but a B width, so I often fold my feet in half lengthwise and cram them in. I'm somewhere in the 7 1/2 to 8 range but tend toward 8s since my feet are shaped like a duck's. So when I happen upon a pair of shoes that are sufficiently wide, I still tend to buy the 8s because I'm used to having all that room at the end of my shoes. The problem with that is, I have all kinds of other problems as time goes by. The extra space at the end folds funny when I walk and eventually cause a crease where a crease should not be. That crease runs right across my pinky toes and causes them all kinds of trauma, namely blisters.

I have freakish little pinky toes as it is. They are small and curl up like a little pig tail. Little piggies are right on when you're describing my toes. They are fat and round and tend to curl right up, especially that little one. It's hard enough to be attractive with goofy little toes like that, then I have to deal with calluses and dead skin from old blisters. It's not pretty. Like feet are pretty anyway, unless you have a fetish.

Anyway, I am your stereotypical woman when it comes to shoes. I love them. I could have a specific pair of shoes for every article of clothing I own, and I would still probably want more. Variety is the spice of life after all. This is one case where I love having options; except for the fact I don't have enough money to have options. We had to go to a specific store because we have a credit card there that has credit available on it. We have $27 and change in our account. No options for me.

Sending a woman who loves shoes into the shoe department to pick one pair of shoes is torture. I don't just love shoes right now; I really do need a couple pair. First, there's the pinky toe situation that is happening in my most often worn shoes. Then there's the shin pain when I walk in my super old cross trainers that I wear because the new pair has bunched up stuffing in the back that hurts like hell and the newer-than-that pair has only been worn outside twice (I use them for Tae-Bo). So I don't really need a pair of walking shoes, but it would be awfully nice not to ruin my pretty trainers for Tae-Bo.

But I do need a pair of black flats. My old ones look like they were made from a black cow that got in a motorcycle accident. My new ones were just a bad purchase. Chalk another one up to, "They will stretch out." They look nice, but I can wear them as far as the garage before I start hobbling.

I could really use some slippers. I don't even know where my old booties are, and they are a pain to get on. Slippers are supposed to be easy. You get out of bed while only partially evolved and aim your toes toward the opening, and voila! Your feet are in a warm, fuzzy cloud. I was fine without slippers until it started getting cold. Our bedroom is over the garage. Couple that with bare wood floors, and you have iceberg toes as soon as they hit the floor. Since I have trouble keeping my feet out of a perpetual state of blue in the winter as it is, starting the day by freezing my feet is not a good idea.

I also think I need some clogs for winter. I love clogs anyway. I love any shoe that is that easy to put on (like slippers). I have summer-type clogs, but none suitable for winter. Canvas just doesn't cut it, and your feet get wet, causing problems with the above-mentioned frozen feet. Now that we have a dog we have to take out on a leash to go do her business, shoes that are quick and easy to get on, especially in the morning, are a must. The dog is very impatient while waiting for shoes to be tied. Now that she seems to be housebroken, we don't need any setbacks. Speed is a must, so warm clogs are too. There are some really cute ones with fake fur lining and fake fleece lining. It would be really nice if I could have the brown and the black. Variety, remember?

Last, but not least, I really want some nifty rugged looking boots. There are a couple styles of Timberland boots that I want so bad I think about selling off baskets to get them. My boots from last year had a seam coming undone, so I will need another pair anyway. Those match lots of things I wear, and I don't have to don winter boots when I wear those. Since I plan on training for some kind of adventure race, good boots would help. By the time I wear them out, I could buy real ones made for that sort of thing. Also, I don't have any winter boots anyway, so that makes the need for those boots even greater. I need them.

I explained this all to the husband a couple days before we went shopping. He smiled at me and said we could get a pair, "a" meaning "one." He finds it quite amusing that I am in such dire need of so many shoes. He would actually provide every one of them if he could, but he takes care of all the bills and stuff now, so he knows exactly how poor we really are. I'm sure if I were still doing bills, I would be going out in the dead of winter in flip-flops if I had to. As much as he wants me to have all the shoes in the world, he is still sensible and he doesn't want me wearing shoes that make my feet hurt.

Back in the store, I see several pair of white Keds that will happily replace the toe-eating Keds I was wearing. I also see lots of great walking shoes and trainers and even Timberland clogs. I then made the mistake of looking around and spotting more cute clogs with the aforementioned fake fur lining and the Timberland boots I'd seen elsewhere. All my wants and needs were in one place, and I had to decide which slot I was going to fill. After trying on clogs and a couple pair of Keds, I decided to be sensible and buy what I wear most. Keds makes their shoes stretchy now, so I don't have to worry so much about pinky toe mutilation over time, and I even bought shoes that fit.

And here I started writing with the intention of talking about my Jane Jetson moment in the mall. I may write about that one later as well as my problem with not throwing away shoes I no longer wear.