I haven't been writing because there have been a limit of two things on my mind: the war and my in-laws. We all know what's going on with the war, thanks to 24 hour news coverage, and my opinion on it isn't really important in the scheme of things, so I really didn't want to talk about that. And my in-laws have been going back and forth for so long that it's really not worth talking about either.

They have settled on one thing, at least my MIL has. My FIL is moving out. He confessed last week what I suspected was the reason for all this trouble all along. He was seeing someone else. It was the person I suspected it to be too. Sometimes being able to say "I told you so," is not a very comforting thing. At first, FIL was going to be with the other woman. Then he changed his mind. Whether that was due to the fact the other woman is moving to Florida or that he doesn't want to throw away more than 30 years of marriage, I don't know. MIL was fine with that until she slept on it, then she wanted him out. I don't blame her. There is no way I could share my house with someone who cheated on me like that. I believe they are still going to try to work things out. The situation seems to change daily, so I really can't say what is going to happen for sure. I would imagine they don't even know at this point.

While their marriage crumbles, mine seems to be getting much better. John tried to explain why he was set free by my statement that I didn't know whether I could accept things they way they were, but neither I nor our counselor understood what the hell he meant. He said that it was simply the fact I could consider accepting him as is that did it. It still seems pretty selfish to me, because he knew I would be compromising my entire life. John never was one to make real sacrifices for others though. In any case, he's been much much better, and I'll take it.

I think I've been much better too. I am more direct when I talk to him about what I want and need rather than letting my feelings fester to the point I blow up. Exercising also helps regulate my mood, and I'm not suffering the horrible lows before my period that I was having, not forgetting to mention I'm not bloating either. I still have times, sometimes days where I feel utterly exhausted though. Those haven't seemed to affect things much, except that I'm not getting as much done as I like.

I did get my bedroom dresser cleaned off. It was stacked halfway up the mirror with stuff. I wish I would have taken before and after photos, but I forgot to do it. I was in the bedroom for longer than usual on Sunday because John had his dad and brother over to mess around with his new electronic drum kit and guitar pedals. I decided to spend a little time to myself in there, but the bed was covered with the mass, last-minute cleaning we did of the living/dining room. I decided to sort through that, and somehow that turned into sorting through everything on my dresser too. Now I have a surface to my dresser again, and I can see myself from my head all the way down to my upper thighs, not that I really want to see those. I found some clothes I had been missing too, so it was a very good thing.

Today I am determined to catch up on laundry. I don't think it's been caught up since I started working in November. Even when John was doing laundry the first couple months, it wasn't ever caught up. In fact, he had a tendency to only do the loads of clothes with stuff in them that he needed, so there were other loads that sat the entire two months. I should be thankful he didn't do them and ruin some of my other clothes, since he shrunk two of my wool sweaters as it was.

I am also determined to stay on track with exercise. Today is Tae-Bo day, and I'll be doing that as soon as I'm done here and finished with my coffee (decaf; still no caffeine for me). I think I'll take a walk with the dog too, since it's not snowing today, and it seems like it's going to get pretty nice out there.

So, is it better to have lots of light, fluffy entries or to stick to few entries with some substance? That's part of the reason I haven't been writing either. I'd love to see more use of the lovely "Comments" feature I now have at the bottom of my entries. It makes me very happy!

(Dammit, I used "so" at the beginning of a sentence again.)

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One Year Ago Today:
Nothing at all