My boss called this morning to have me help in the clinic if I could. I planned to go in and print the things I needed anyway, and of course there's the ever-present need for money, so I said I'd be there. I got a shower, found some clean scrubs that fit, and got ready to head out. I set everything on the table, put the dog away, grabbed my stuff, and went out the door. As I pulled the door closed and felt it latch, I knew I made a mistake. I had my purse, my magazine for the shuttle ride, and my money, but I didn't have my keys in my hand like I usually do as I head out. Other times, that caused a frantic search through my purse where they always were because I'd dropped them in there to free my hand for carrying something. But this time, I didn't even look. My hand was free of anything to carry. It was free, period. And I could envision the keys sitting on the table, next to my purse before I left, and I knew they were still there. I never touched them once I set them there.
We got new windows for the house last year. They were much-needed. The others had many broken seals, questionable locks, broken locks, greying white vinyl, poor installation (something we more fully realized upon replacement), and the one in Hammy's room was littering falling out of its fram. One winder was even original to the house--a single-pane, metal, crank window. They were inefficient (though inefficient assumes they had some efficiency, which was questionable), ugly, and insecure. The new windows are beautiful and have already saved us a good bit over the winter. We didn't fight over who got to sit in the chairs far away from the windows anymore. The blinds and curtains don't flutter when the windows are closed and it's breezy. I can't see outside between the window frame and the wall in the living room. Hammy isn't at risk of rolling out of his loft bed and ending up in the back yard. The furnace didn't run all winter long. All the locks work and work well. We can see clearly out every window except the bathroom, which is supposed to be frosted. And now we can actually let the kids have the windows in their rooms open a little at night because of the security stops. We just didn't have that option before without fearing some loon steaking one ofthem while we slept in the next room. Parents who have lost their own children can know two others are safe because of what happened to them. Until these windows, our kids just dealt with stale house air, or we turned on the AC sooner than we liked.
All that security meant there was no way to crawl through a window (hopefully unseen to save myself the embarassment). They were either fully locked, or the security stops were up. With some, it was both, as if that matters. Even the small windows, through which I would not fit, were locked or secured. It definitely made me feel safe, but I sure wish I would have screwed that up today.
I also took care of our back door just yesterday. It was swelling from humidity now that summer finally decided to show up. It does it every year, getting a little worse each time. Saturday, it just wouldn't close all the way, no matter how well I be it with my battering ram (aka my big butt), which always worked before. That night we rigged an alarm of garbage and other junk to clatter loudly if the door budge an inch. Yesterday, I used our newly purchased wood scraper (not a technical term, though I should clarify) and shaved the door enough to close, only to find out the screw on the strike plate was sticking out to cause the readl problem. So I screwed that back in and tightened the doorknob which had come loose from all the recent door wrestling. Darn door was tight as a drum and not an entry point without breaking glass. Definitely not.
I checked for the spare key that I knew wouldn't be there, because John either never got it back from his friend who took care of our beasts over vacation or he forgot what he did with it. This has happened two times. The first time, we told him to keep the key, just in case. So he could have up to three keys, but I doubt it, because he said he gave the others back to John. John=absentminded, Beatty=lawyer, so take your pick. I choose Beatty. Two spare keys, none where I could get them.
Next plan, cell phone. I was on the side porch, digging through my purse, but I couldn't find it. I checked where I set my purse down earlier. Not there. I checked my magazine (hey, it's a small phone). Not there. You guess it... it was sitting right next to the keys. So I couldn't even call John, so he could call Beatty's wife to come let me in my house. I didn't even have Beatty's number in my cell phone anymore, because my address book mysteriously erased one day.
Luck was so not going in my favor.
To further prove that, the heavy, black clouds overhead started cracking violently, and what seemed a waterfall of rain came down. So I was stuck on the porch, sitting in the doorway because I wasn't sitting on the wicker furniture for fear of getting cat pee smell on me. I haven't washed anything out there yet, and the cats have been accidentally locked on out on the porch too many times. Lightning was blasting all around. I'm usually fascinated by thunderstorms, but this was way too close for comfort, especially when I was stuck outside. The electrical activity and torrential rain guaranteed I wasn't running next door to use the phone for a while.
Since I had time to kill, I looked around the porch for anything I could use to break into the door. The whole "breaking in the door" thing was a longshot at best anyway. I'm no burglar and hadn't a clue how to do it. All I found was an old spatula and basting brush from the BBQ set left on the porch from last summer. Maybe someone better than I can break into a door with a spatula. I obviously could not.
About a half hour later, the rain let up, and I went next door. Both cars in the drive meant someone was home. They are a little older than my parents and both retired. I tried the front door. No answer. The bottom door by the garage opened. I went down there. I knocked. No one came. I knocked again. No one came. I knocked really loudly. Finally Jack showed up. I told him sheepishly I locked myself out and asked to use his phone. John wasn't at his desk, so I left a message. I also called work and explained something they already knew. I'm an idiot. Jack offered to take me to work himself. I refused. He offered several times. I refused several times. He grabbed his keys and told me to come on. I said I couldn't. I had to be home in time for the kids to get home from school, so we could possibly all be locked out together. Hammy rarely remembers his key. Jack did something I seemed to be incapable of doing that day--he used his brain.
"Hammy might have a key?" he asked.
"Possibly," I answered.
"Why don't you call the school and see if you can have him paged?"
It is so good to have smart neighbors. I called the school, but Hamm was taking a final. They would have him call me back. I waited for about ten minutes, chatting with Jack and Carol about how stupid I was. Jack suggested putting a spare key somewhere and leaving one with them too. I said I would. When Hammy called back, he sounded very worried, as expected. I asked if he had his key. To my relief and a little surprise, he did. Jack took me to get the key.
So about an hour and a half after I locked myself out of the house, I got back in. Our secretary said she could still use my help at work, so I went in anyway for a couple hours where I was thoroughly harassed about my morning.
Almost everything that could have gone wrong did, except that the neighbors were home. Otherwise, I would have been forced to sit outside my house until John got home. I might have had to do yardwork or something, God forbid. I had new spare keys made. Of course, while cleaning not much later, I found the two keys John had. I like to blame him for this mishap as much as I blame myself.
---------------------------------------------
One Year Ago Today:
