When Mom isn't all-powerful

Booie woke up screaming this morning. That's not exactly the best thing to do for a sore throat, but she was hurting and a little scared, and it seemed the right thing for her to do. She squealed and whined and put on a dramatic performance while holding her throat with one hand. If I didn't know she was honestly sick, I would have laughed. John and I came to her aid by spraying her throat, giving her some Motrin and putting her back to bed with a bucket at her bedside because she thought she might throw up. She has a doctor's appointment at 3. I think the strep finally got her.

Her getting strep after the rest of us are done with our antibiotics has turned me into the Lysol queen. I'm spraying everything with the stuff: light switches, doorknobs, faucets, chairs, remotes, computer keyboard and mouse. I'd spray the dog if it wouldn't kill her. Booie has been hanging all over that dog since she repositioned herself from her bed to the TV-containing living room.

It seems the medicines and the TV have helped. She's not even whining anymore, and she's eating breakfast. I checked her temperature, which is high and felt her glands, which are swollen. She says her throat just feels funny now, but I know it's just a matter of time before no amount of medicine will stop it from hurting. Sick children always remind me how little control I have. I just want to make it all better right now, and that's not always possible.

I should just use this for the training it is. I'm never going to be able to protect my children from everything, no matter how badly I want to do it. If I try, I end up hurting them more than helping them. I was pretty well-protected as a child, and I'm still pretty na�ve because of it. I want my children to have better tools to survive in the world than I have. I don't blame my parents for doing what they thought best to take care of me, but I will learn from it. At least, I hope I will.

Booie's illness has thrown a wrench in more than my role as defender. I was planning on taking my walk this morning while she was in school, but now that's going to have to wait. At least it's only a fifteen minute walk for today. Tomorrow is another story though. I have a 1.5 mile run/walk. Booie will still be home, since she will still be contagious, so I'll probably have to wait to run until J gets home. That means running in the dark, which I hate. I always feel like I'm going to get run over or that I'm going to trip and fall. I'm not exactly Miss Grace as it is, so running in the dark presents an extra challenge for me. I suppose it's good training though. I might have to leave Kaya at home for that run though. I can deal with myself getting run over, but I don't want to endanger her.