It happened. I was in yesterday's paper. Part of my fifteen minutes of fame can be attributed to coffee. It's most appropriate.
What is most far from appropriate is the misspelling of my name. I know you all have no idea what a whopper of a last name I have. I purposely don't list it on here, because there are so few people with my last name that it would be like sending out a flare saying, "Come read my journal!" While I'm not really trying to remain private, I also don't want to advertise. Putting my fourteen-letter long last name on here would be advertisement. My last name, when put into Google, only results in five pages of hits (a whopping nine if you do the expanded search). 80% of those people are us or John's family. Nearly 50% of those hits are either John or myself. I'm sure we're also somehow related to the ones I didn't know.
You would think my last name was misspelled, right? It typically is the victim of many misspellings and truncations. Not this time. No, this time it was my first name that was misspelled. I was listed as Candy.
It could have been worse, I know, but who wants to be a Candy? (I'm sorry to all the Candys out there. I just don't like your name, and I don't want to share it with you. You can detest Cindy just as vehemently. Send me some hate mail if it makes you feel better.) I told my mother-in-law that it's not like Cindy isn't a ditzy enough name. If you know Polish, you would know my last name means "surprise." I always thought Cindy Surprise sounded like a stripper name, but Candy Surprise, well, that's more than a stripper. Much better than that thing where you use your first pet's name and the name of the street where you grew up. Puff Bryan just doesn't cut it. Candy Surprise... now that's a name!
John's aunt called me last night, said, "Hey Candy!" and began laughing hysterically. Having the well-honed wit that I do, I replied, "That's my stage name." We all know what stage that would be.
So my vile name is listed in the same article as my children. I suppose Candys have children too. I would like to think that none of them name their kids things like Peppermint, Lollipop, or even worse, Snickers, but I bet there are some who do. Some parents don't mind plaguing their children with a lifetime of their bad sense of humor. I just hope mine don't get teased too much for having a mom named Candy, and that isn't even my name. They seem to be more excited that they are in the paper themselves though, so maybe Candy won't factor into it.
If anyone wants to read the article, email me, and I'll send you the link.
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One Year Ago Today:
From Singles to Doubles
