...And All Through the House, There Was Mayhem and Panic

I don't remember when it was I said I wasn't feeling the pressure of Christmas approaching, but I can now officially say I was deluded. I think the only reason I didn't feel pressure was because my head was firmly wedged in my ass, where it resided until just yesterday.

I was wasting time at work to try to get out of paying for parking in the garage. Usually the attendant leaves about 6:40, so I get out of paying the $15 it costs for the day. I was doing stupid, time-consuming tasks when my boss said I could leave. I ended up talking to her for a while, and she asked how my shopping was coming along. I told her I still had a lot to do. I do. She admitted she does too, and then she said it. "Christmas is next week."

Did everyone but me know Christmas is next week? Where have I been? How did it creep up so quickly? How in the world can I write the date several times a day at work yet not know how close Christmas is? We just got our tree up this weekend. Christmas cannot be next week.

But it is, and I'm so not ready. I have no real decorations up in the house but the two things I bought from Target that day and a snowman on my computer monitor that my mother-in-law gave us. And there's the tree, but it isn't even decorated, because Booie was sick (again) over the weekend. We didn't do that last night because I worked, and tonight my son has his band concert. Wednesday I work again, but I think I'm going to have to suck it up, overcome my tiredness and put some ornaments on the stupid tree. Thank God I bought a fake, pre-lit tree last year.

I do have some gifts bought. I made an arrangement with my mom to pay for a gift she already got for my sister, so that one's done. I always feel bad when I don't get my sister's gift on time. She's officially an adult now and all, even living on her own and going to college, but still. That is one big pressure relieved. There are other gifts I have to send though, so some people on my list (like my poor parents) will be getting things late. I just send my brother's hoard money, and I better get that done... oh... today for it to have a chance of getting there on time, but at least it can be done. So some stuff is done or easy to do but not nearly enough.

I'm really dragging my feet today too, and I can't afford to do that. But man do I want to curl up in a blanket and read all day long. I feel like I've been running since Thanksgiving, yet I'm not even close to being done for Christmas. It seems impossible to be so busy yet not be done, and I know it's because I'm working now. I may be frazzled, rushed, and behind on things every single year, but it's ten times worse this year because I don't have all the time I did before. I can't put things off like I did previous years. So even though I desperately want to be a lazy bum today, I can't do it. I have too much to do.

I still have a bit of a sick feeling about work sometimes. All this trouble with Christmas, Booie being sick, arranging schedules, parking fees, and having to plan for vacation are inconveniences with which I haven't dealt in years. I know other people do this all the time, but it's like new to me. I don't want to be whining about it all the time, but until I get comfortable and figure out how to handle these things better, I need that vent. If I could do this over again, I wouldn't get a job right before Christmas. It was a rotten time to start working.

I won't be writing tomorrow, since I'll be working, but I hope that I will have done so much today that I would have an entry full of productivity. Maybe Thursday. Maybe eventually I won't be so overwhelmed that I can write on work days, but right now I just have to get through Christmas.