I felt pretty good yesterday. Today was looking hopeful too. Then one thing happened (or more accurately, didn't happen) that sent me into a tizzy. All it takes is that one thing and now my day is ruined. It starts with him ignoring me in the shower and turns into everything wrong with me and my life. Particularly me. Because why else would my husband, who stayed home from work today not check on me or join me? He doesn't want to be around me, of course. It's more appealing to copy band peformances, check email, and playon the computer than it is to spend time with your fat, unhappy wife. Makes perfect sense. Even if it's wrong.

4:38 p.m. - Purposeless

As much as I know I should exercise right now, I don't want to. Four hours ago I was crying about how fat I am, among other things. Then I go eat my entire plateful of food at Olive Garden with salad and a breadstick and a half. Now I don't want to exercise, and I'm eating Thin Mints. I have become a fat slob. Right now, I just don't care either.

11:16 p.m. - The Twin In Me

There are days like today when I wish I were different, but then I just don't care enough to change it. Then there are days when I decide to do what I have to do to be where I want to be. The problem lies with the fact there are way more of the days like today.

I spent the evening restless but not wanting to do anything. I ate. I watched TV. I read.

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One Year Ago Today: