Scatterbrained

I started to write an entry three times yesterday. Even when I finally got enough down to be qualified as an entry, I didn't get it put up. I just put it up. Now I have to finish writing something for today.

It's not that I don't want to write. It's just I have a million other things vying for my attention, and those things are winning. I can't seem to keep on one task for any length of time at all. I flit from chore to chore, and thoughts are no different. I'm finding things left in strange places throughout my house because I got distracted and left them there. There was a spoon in my refrigerator. The mail from the other day was in the drawer in my bedroom where I keep my hair stuff. L's pants were in the middle of the living room floor. How do I do these things? I am so out of it lately.

The good thing is I'm out of it in a good way. It's not because I'm moping around or surfing the web too much or watching TV or something. I'm actually doing things. I'm not getting a damn thing finished at all, but in some cases, it's more important to do a little than finish. Doing a little cleaning is sure as heck better than none at all. Same goes for laundry and yard work. And really, isn't it more amusing to find things in goofy places? I think so.

Marriage counseling has definitely lit a fire under me. That's definitely a good thing. It started before we even went the first time. There is something about a sense of authority in someone that just makes me want to get things done. Inside, I guess I haven't gotten over that need for structure and expectations. J certainly doesn't have it. I could truly sit on my ass watching soap operas and eating bonbons all day, and he would barely speak a word. The only thing he'd want is work clothes to be clean. I could definitely use more bitching from him sometimes. But I better be careful what I wish for.

Speaking of counseling (I know... it's all I talk about anymore), J walked out yesterday with the MMPI tucked under his arm. That is the one thing I was really hoping to avoid this time around. I hate being categorized, but he said it was definitely more for him that it was for me. It seems J is a bit of an enigma to the doctor, whereas I'm an open book. She probably had me pegged the first session. I don't know if that's a good thing or not. At least I don't have to go in and be timed on the damn thing. Hopefully I won't be boiling over with anger like I was the last time I took it. I'm much more interested in J's results than I am mine. Mine will just print out the results in one word: LOON.

Some of the questions on this thing kill me. Who is really going to admit they hear voices no one else hears? Maybe I'm not crazy enough to tell the truth to questions like that. And what in the world do bowel movements have to do with mental health? Ok, so maybe constipation can make a person a little cranky, but still. I wonder how the authors of this test came up with these questions. I know all those questions are there for a reason, but they sure seem silly on the outside.

I'm going to try to get a printout of my results. That would be great fun.

Now I need to go make dinner. I'll be taking bets on where the utensils and food end up. They don't ask if you leave coffee cups in the bathroom on the MMPI. Don't be gross. I don't drink coffee on the toilet. I drink it in the shower. Seriously, I'm not exactly sure how the cup got in there, because I wasn't drinking coffee in the bathroom at all. See what I mean about scatterbrained?